Things I Hate This Week

1. People Who Don't Know How to Ride the Escalator

Stand on the right, walk on the left. Why is it that everyone does not know this? Every night I go to class, all of which are on the 9th floor. The most convenient way to get there is via the escalator. Never - not once - have I been able to get to my destination quickly because of the idiots that stand on the left, blocking the flow of traffic.

Also, I transfer to the Blue Line train at the Clark/Lake stop, and there's an escalator to take you down to the platform. What is with the people who hear the train coming yet continue to stand there (on the left) and not hurry along? Do you not want to catch the approaching train? I just missed my connecting train last night because of some asshole who refused to move aside. Thanks, douchie!

2. Carnie Wilson

Carnie (nice name, btw) was on The Today Show (or rather that show that is on right after The Today Show) yesterday as a guest host or something, and they were talking about the Heath Ledger tragedy. Carnie's response: "He was so sexy."

Umm, really? This is our reaction to Heath Ledger's death 18 hours later? I'm embarrassed for her.

Also, why is she still fat? Didn't she get her stomach removed a few years ago?

3. Balsamic Vinegar Squirting in Your Eye

I was eating a salad yesterday, and goddamn if that shit doesn't hurt like a mother.