Wednesday, February 20, 2008

New York State of Mind (Pt. II: Electric Boogaloo)

So where to begin with the rest of the weekend?

I'll start with a lowlight: It sucks walking around Manhattan in the cold light of day with a hangover. It sucks waiting in a long line outside in the cold light of day with a hangover in Times Square trying to get tickets to Spring Awakening, only to discover 45 fucking minutes into the wait that tickets are sold out anyway. Fuerzabruta? Also sold out. And I don't even like Broadway shows; all I wanted to do is get one of those cookies with colored sprinkles on them from the Roxy, but even that proved to be impossible.

Now on to the rest. Later, we decided to drink in our hotel room like Chingy, except we're not at the Holiday Inn, we're at the fucking Hilton New York Midtown (tres classier),
bitches. And instead of sipping on Hen, we're drinking 40s of Kirin beer and lots of vodka lemonades (as a professional bartender, Krista makes these lemonade elixirs that defy explanation in their goodness and level of intoxication; the trouble I've gotten into by drinking these has been well documented on this and other blogs). And instead of listening to Snoop and Luda and watching BET, we're listening to Roxette, the Jacksons (Janet and Michael) and watching the Top Design marathon on Bravo.

Because that's how we roll, shawties.

Anyway, Krista and I are sufficiently lubricated and head down to the hotel lobby bar to wait for my friend Sean to arrive. While there, we notice the older unhappily married couple next to us listening in to our conversation. I hate that shit, so we decide to stage a fight ("You never listen to a word I say!" and "You need to see the doctor about your erectile dysfunction!") and soon the unhappily marrieds have left our corner.

Soon afterwards the three of us meet up with my friend Doug at some strange loft party in the East Village. You know when you've been drinking and you're out and the edges of your peripheral vision start getting fuzzy? I've passed that point about 30 minutes earlier. The party is large and dark and loud. Doug hands each of the three of us a drink that I suspect to be gin and fruit punch. Or maybe sake and carrot juice. I'm not sure, but the point is it is disgusting. But not so disgusting that I don't finish the whole thing in a hurry because the party is ending (but we've just arrived!) and we're off to Automatic Slims in the West Village.

Automatic Slims is hot and oh-so-crowded. We think about leaving immediately, but the Supremes, then Prince, then (I think) the Eagles come on, so we stay. And drink some more.

Next is The Spotted Pig (there's a theme emerging among our choice of bars), which is fine but I spot no celebrities. Sean, Krista and I are there for at least an hour and engaged in some deep passionate discussions yet I can remember pretty much none of it.

To keep the Weekend of Pork theme alive, the evening ends with some slices of pepperoni and bacon from Ray's on 7th. Oh, and then there was the hot dog from Papaya King at the airport.

So to recap the weekend:
1) we drink (a lot);
2) we are a part of the Rhythm Nation
3) we make new friends (Jersey kids, New Zealand people, girls at the ATM);
4) we anger some people (unhappy married couple, white leather jacket girl);
5) we hate Times Square;
6) pork.


suzara said...

Still sad I wasn't there to say hi!!!! (but London ROCKED!) I saw Sean last night and he said you guys had a good time.

Don't forget those pictures! :-)

Catherinette Singleton said...

Doesn't it pretty much suck anywhere when you're walking around with a hangover?

5 of 9er said...

Papaya King.... mmmmmm.

Krista said... see, I read your blog when I am the primary topic of conversation. Ah, the spotlight, the center of attention - the place I like to be. Hey, if American Idol won't take me, I will settle for a moment in Cherry Ride glory. :)

I miss you already and wish that we were back busting a move in the hotel room (which "moves" I am referring to is all relative and subject to individual interpretation...)

Dude, and we both know that I could have kicked the crap out of white leather lady AND her man-whore (or husband...whatever). It doesn't take much more than the 17 beers that I had already consumed for me to throw-down WWE style.

After some much needed sleep, I am realizing how much fun we actually did have, how much I wish we were still there (or at least still together in the same city), and how many fully-functioning brain cells I drank away. Ah, the good life...


ridiculous said...

i have a mini-buzz/hangover just from reading your blog post.

Big Daddy said...

Hee hee.

You said 'pork'.

Yes, I am a third grader.

classyandfancy said...

I wish rappers would start using midget instead of shawty. Get it midget get it midget. Midget got low low low low low. Just has a better ring to it.

Ms. Laaw-yuhr said...

Awww, Cherry, I can tell that if we ever hung out it would be a blast. Last evening I had like that ended with me passed out on the metro and one of my gay boyfriends stroking my hair. (sigh) Good times.

Michael5000 said...

Part II of anything is better when it is subtitled "Electric Boogaloo." I am glad you understand this.

This post made me concerned I'm not drinking enough. Maybe I can catch up this weekend.

ReckenRoll said...

I am reading this with a slight hangover and am fuzzy around the edges.

You remind me of the good times that got me here.

Damn I want a cuban pork sandwich. That sound AWESOME right now.

Jules said...

It makes me sad in my pants to think about how many times I've had arguments at bars with various men about their need to see an actual professionally trained DOCTOR about their erectile disfunction.

Other than that, your trip to NYC sounds like a such a great time! I've been sucked into staying longer at many-a-bar once they play Prince, though usually around that time is when the erectile disfunction arguments begin. Also, how come Ray's on 7th always follows an E.D. argument?

House of Jules

radioactive girl said...

I love that you ended this with pork and I laughed. Sounds like a great time though!

minijonb said...

nice skyline pic!

Alison said...

this sounds about 10,000,000 times more fun than any of my NY trips! hangover and all...

Mr. Shain said...

you're quite black, nigga.

Kadonkadonk said...

Electric Boogaloo! Oh, how I've always wanted to lock and pop...