Monday, April 24, 2006

Saparated at Birth II: Electric Boogaloo

Because I'll be damned if I let anyone tell me I look like Liberace! I decided to try MyHeritage again.

But before I got into all that nonsense, I want to congratulate my friend Shannon for scoring a new Zihuantanejoan boyfriend (and he's Policia too - hot!). I had never heard of this place called Zihuantanejo but Shannon assures me it exists. "Let’s just say it ain’t no Cancun" she says. Well, Shannon, nothing ever is. Here's a photo of the happy couple:

And now getting back to the important issue at hand: ME. I decided to try MyHeritage again using another photo:

I think this is a decent photo of me (despite the large forehead; I must have been leaning into the shot. But anyway...), so I thought it might return better results. (Granted, I was drunk when this photo was taken, and just minutes before this snapshot, I was jumping into piles of garbage on the streets of London [it seemed like a funny idea at the time]. And shortly after this photo, my friend Jessica and I would be refused entry into a SoHo club by an angry lesbian bouncer, but that, alas, is another story.)

And this is what MyHeritage spit back at me:
Christopher Walken Samwise Gamgee Jason Biggs

This totally sucks. Christopher Walken looks like he just stuck an electric handmixer up his ass (not that I would know what that would look like). And am I really as fat as the hobbit?

And just when I had lost all faith, MyHeritage also spit back some top-shelf celebrity hotties:

Hugh Jackman Dennis Quaid David Beckham

I feel better now. But I have to say this David Beckham one must be a serious glitch in their system. As any of my friends know, I unfortunately look nothing like him. Not even close. Even on my best day and his worst. But again, these folks are the experts so who am I to question them?

PS - While I would be flattered to look like Hugh or Dennis, I think it's funny that MyHeritage thinks I look like them in only these really unflattering photos. Hugh looks like he's about to vomit and Dennis looks like he's as drunk as I was on said garbage bag diving night. But I'll take what I can get.

4 comments:

Shaun said...

OK - too addictive! So, I got Sean Astin, Tom Sizemore, Dan Akroyd and KATHLEEN TURNER!

Karen said...

Ok, Mr. Nacho. You now have me completely hooked on something new and addictive. Because I don't want to look like Murphy Brown.

So I've been searching all over my computer for photo's of me actually facing the camera. Do you have any idea how difficult that seems to be for me? Oh, unless of course the shot is taken by someone a foot shorter than I am, and all you can see is an enormous triple chin. If I submit those, all I'll get is Jabba the Hut as a return.

(As an aside, Liberace? You poor, poor man.)

karenthebaron

Pink Hobbit said...

What's wrong with looking like a hobbit?

Wingman said...

I tried it several times. Several photos. Got some nice hits.

However, the number one match (came up with every photo) was Michelle Rodriguez! Ew.